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Greatest Moments

With the holiday break, I was able to spend a little more time with my family. Specifically, I saw more of my brother and sister. Now, I've mentioned before that things get interesting when you put multiple Chang siblings together. Heck, we even have our own language to help describe the shenanigans that usually go down between us. Even with the usual banter, though, there are some moments that are truly stand out.

I've written once before about some of my brother's shining moments in messing with solicitors, but my sister is no slouch, either. For a very simple example, let me explain what she did to buy my brother's birthday gift last year. She wasn't entirely sure what to get him, and she didn't have the luxury of daily conversations to guide her. In addition, she also wanted to avoid him buying himself the same thing she was going to get him. Now, you might see obstacles, but my sister saw an opportunity: she asked him, "tell me, [brother], what can Amazon.com bring to you for your birthday?" He laughed for a good while when she asked him, and the story drew a chuckle from me, as well.

Even better, she once managed to convince someone that she had "Peruvian SARS." She said it with a straight face and a matter-of-fact tone, so the guy didn't even suspect she was messing with him. This was actually a while after the actual outbreak, and she wasn't anywhere close to sick at the time. Still, she managed to make up a disease and convince someone else that she had it. The punchline to all of this came a few minutes afterward. All of a sudden, the guy suddenly stopped mid-thought, and asked her, "wait, SARS has countries now?" Cue laughter.

My favorite of my sister's shenanigans, however, came when dealing with a bank representative over the phone (dealing with my siblings over the phone is apparently a recipe for disaster). She had moved, and her bank didn't have any branches near her new place. So, she called the bank to close her accounts. Not wanting to lose any business, the representative she spoke with tried everything he could do to get her to change her mind. This conversation lasted a while, but the tail end of it was the best part (slightly paraphrased):

Representative: "Okay, so what do I need to do get you to stay with us?"
Sister: "You know what, I can think of one thing"
Representative: "What?"
Sister: "Come out here and open up branches just for me, in [new address]. It'll be the first in the state, no less. You do that, and I'm good."
Representative: "Um ... Uh, I can't do that. We do have ATMs there, though."
Sister: "Nope, I need people. ATMs don't count, I can't talk to them."

The guy had hope for just a second, but then she asked for something outlandish. I'm amazed she didn't start laughing right then and there (I probably would have). In the end, he did the equivalent of slumping his shoulders and resigning himself to his fate. I also had a little more amusement in my life.

Screw presents, I just like the holidays because I get to talk to my siblings.
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