Skip to main content

I Speak So Well

I think someone at work may have called me retarded today. Don't believe me? I'll let you decide. Here are the facts:

A. "He speaks so well" is not a compliment
B. Someone said "good job on writing that email" to me today.

For the purposes of this exercise, I'm treating "he speaks so well" and "good job writing that email" as the same. It's the same sentiment, just applied to a different medium. Assuming that's true, the transitive property means that that person just called me retarded.

Then again, I'm competing against, "good job word-smithing that document" and "please snake this with X & Y to make sure it's vetted by the right people." Seriously? Word-smithing? Vetted? Yes, I know what those terms means. No, I'm not impressed. In fact, if you ever hear me utter those words in a non-joking manner, I give you permission to hit me upside the head.

Funnily enough, I once had to submit a writing sample for this business writing course, and I wrote what should have been called, "Why Buzzwords Suck." I've never met the guy who graded the thing, but I think I made his day. When I got it back, his review said something along the lines of, "I'm with you. Keep up the good fight!" Oh, and he let me test out of the class.

It's gotten so bad, that for certain things, we are actually supposed to have someone proof-read our emails before we send them out. Apparently we are not to be trusted sending emails all by lonesome. These are impressionable minds, and we might corrupt a mind or two if left to our own devices (well, okay, they might have a bit of a point with that last part).

Anyhow, to recap what I learned at work today: I am possibly retarded, but it's also possible I'm not the most retarded person at work. Who says work is boring?

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

From Scratch 2

A few months ago, I tried my hand at making home-made dumplings . It came out all right, and it was definitely passable for a first attempt, but we always said that we should have another go at it. After all, if we liked it all right when we made it with no first-hand experience, it should come out even better after having at least one rep under our belt, right? We found out this weekend. First of all, the Mild Wife helped with the dough preparation this time around. I knew to be wary of making the dough too sticky this time around, but because she has more experience with baking, she was able to guide us through the pitfalls. What really surprised me was just how little water you can/should add at a time. We're talking about a tablespoon at a time when you're trying to make a ball of dough. I mean, I knew not to overwater it from previous experience, but it still surprised me to add in that little water at a time. Still, there was a method to this ( including the trusty sanduk...

Inside and Outside

As I've mentioned before, the Mild Wife and I invested in a sewing machine during the pandemic. It was the most basic model we could find, but it was good enough for what we needed: to make a few masks. And now, over a year later, I still think that it was a good investment. Interestingly, even with restrictions being lifted a bit, we still find that we need masks. Some stores still require them, and neither of us wants to be in a position where we needed a mask and didn't have one. So, we still have to wear and wash them. And even though we've never run out of clean masks to wear, we did notice that we were close a couple of times. So, I recently broke out the sewing machine to make a few more masks. When we initially invested in supplies, we bought a pack of fabric squares. We figured we weren't going to need super high quality, and having a bunch of squares would give us options in case one of us screwed up (read: me). That also gave us the ability to add a little v...

Pink

Way back in high school, there was a male teacher that all the girls thought was attractive. It was an open secret that a bunch of them had crushes on him. In fact, the school newspaper even did an article about him that quoted some girl saying, "he's so cute, he even makes pink look good." Yes, he had worn a pink shirt to school one day, and it had apparently been a big hit. I was reminded of this story when my sister-in-law suggested that she would choose pink as the color for her wedding and bridal party. I don't think I've ever made a color look good before, but I remember thinking, "well, I know it's possible to not look stupid in pink as a straight guy, I guess I can try." And I think that's almost exactly what I told her. I also happened to own a gray suit, so I figured the combination would look all right. However, I was pretty much the only one willing to play along. My sister-in-law's brothers wanted absolutely no part of th...