Mild Amusement

There is a little bit of a front lawn in front of my house, and I have been neglecting it for a while. Now, I don't even pretend like I have a green thumb , so I have no illusions about trying to carefully plant, water, or nurture anything that blooms. I do, however, know how to pull out weeds, so I don't mind holding myself accountable for that. In fact, it's like a mini violence spree, so it can be cathartic under the right circumstances. Anyhow, I finally got around to yanking out some of those weeds when I had an, um, interesting experience. Since I knew I was going to be getting dirty, I threw on some ratty clothes. I also emptied my pockets, since I figured I wasn't going to need my wallet or my house keys any time soon. So, I rolled out the green bin that's meant for anything that can be composted, and got to work. Like I said, I'd been neglecting the weeds for a while, so there was plenty of work to do. Rather than stand up and bend back down after...

Over the years, I have occasionally found myself in stores mainly targeted for women at times. Whether it be helping a friend shop for a last-minute wedding dress , shopping for a purse for my mom , or even just accompanying a female friend to the mall, I've stepped foot in stores for women's apparel. As a guy, you stand out in those stores. You're clearly not in the target demographic, so your mere presence can raise an eyebrow or two. If you're standing near a female companion, though, that usually explains the situation to anyone who bothers to look closely. Incidentally, this is also part of the reason why I try to be helpful when in said stores. If I'm by that person's side, I'm going to get fewer weird looks from the other patrons. Of course, being at that person's side also means that I will be conscripted to be useful; you take the good with the bad, you know? But what happens when there is no female companion to be had? It doesn't happen...

I am an information junkie. Always have been. I'm one of those people that cares far more about the storyline in a video game than the actual game play. At work, I will spend time researching things related to solved problems, because I want to know exactly why it failed in the first place. And if someone learns something new, I want to go see what it's about, because I want to know what they know. I know it's not exactly the average outlook on life, but it is what it is. Anyhow, this mentality leads to my habit of tracking various websites, blogs, and other internet web sources to keep my information flow constant. Doing all of this manually is tedious at best, though, so I use Google Reader  to organize all of these feeds. It just makes things simpler to have a single source of RSS feeds, so that I can quickly browse through items related to my interests. Given all of that, it should come as no surprise that I also try to keep up with my feeds on a regular basis. I ...

A while back, I had one heck of a time ordering a beer . It wasn't anybody's fault, but it took far longer than expected to simply order a beverage. After a team lunch at work this week, I've learned that I should be happy I got my chosen beer at all. I was in the first batch of people to arrive, so the waitress came to take our drink orders while we waited. The first thing I noticed that she addressed everyone as "love" or "honey." It was quaint, and made it feel a little more homey, but I didn't think much of it. She can talk however she likes so long as she's not being offensive. Luckily, they had plenty of lemonade, so I didn't have to endure a repeat of the beer incident. Since we had to wait for others to arrive, I took advantage of the time to figure out what I was going to order. I didn't particularly feel like eating a lot, so I was thinking of lighter fare. After scanning the menu a few times, I settled on a roast beef panin...

I happen to be a Chris Rock fan. Most of the time, his stuff is funny and has a little social commentary thrown in. The goofy looking faces don't hurt, either. Anyhow, he did this one bit where cops gave him a hard time because he was black. The punchline is something along the lines of, " he scared me so bad, I thought I'd stolen my own car ." I've always thought it was funny, if nothing else because it's a ridiculous response to a bad situation. As of this week, I know how he feels. I got up on Tuesday morning and went about my business as usual. I had ironed a shirt & picked out a pair of gray slacks the night before, so I got dressed fairly quickly. It's not like it's hard or anything: slacks, shirt, jacket, shoes, beanie. It's also the same routine every morning, so I don't even think about it any more. I can, and do, do it while half asleep. Really, the only detail that's changed over the years is that I'll wear a black leat...

A while back, I got one of those Visa gift cards. As soon as I saw it, I recognized what it was. I'm no stranger to those gift cards, because I've had to buy a couple of them as gifts for others in the past. The idea is that it works just like a credit card, so the receiver can spend it on pretty much anything he wants. And since the person receiving the gift card doesn't have to pay for the amount that was pre-loaded on to the card, it's essentially free money. As I'm discovering, though, there are a couple of minor details that can make using the gift card all sorts of interesting. For example, my friend was telling me that, on occasion,  restaurants will keep the "account" open for a few days. I'm not entirely sure I understand the rationale, but apparently the tip is treated differently than the meal itself. It sounds like some sort of bookkeeping oddity, and normally I'd just laugh about it. However, this particular oddity can mean that th...

I'm not sure that there's a better way to describe it, but I have weird conversations sometimes. It's not that I intentionally go looking to spout off nonsense, but I am generally willing to play along. So when people say odd things, I don't shut down the conversation right then and there. If there's a joke to be made somewhere in that process, odds are that I'll at least consider it. Basically, I'm no stranger to an oddball sentence or two. Even so, I have to watch myself. Sometimes, there are things that can be read in the wrong way, with borderline ridiculous results. I don't mean "results" as in someone might get offended; no, I mean "results" as in someone might get arrested. What's even crazier is that it's never my fault. I may be all for cracking jokes, but I'd prefer not to have run-ins with people like the police. Luckily, it doesn't happen often. Still, there are three examples that readily come to mind: M...