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The Litmus Test

I have a friend that I am going to start calling, "Litmus Test." It's no fault of her own, but circumstances have just worked out that way. To be clear, I also don't mean it in an insulting manner. However, the nickname is just too fitting to pass up.

Why, you ask? Well, gather 'round, children. I've got a couple of stories to tell.

A long while back, I was dating a girl that I introduced to a few of my friends. The girl had actually planned a surprise birthday party for me, and it was the first time that she was meeting some of these people. She was both nervous & excited about interacting with all of these people, and I didn't really blame her. One of the people she met happened to be Litmus Test, and they greeted each other with a hug. Seeing that things were okay, I left her side to greet a few other guests that had shown up. The party seemed to go well, so I figured it was a success.

Au contraire.

Apparently, the Mild Ex had grievances with a few people at that party. I didn't personally witness anything along those lines, but I also had to be a decent host so I wasn't with her the whole time. This did not help matters any, and I somehow ended up in a big fight. The actual fight and the results are completely irrelevant to this tale, the point is that shortly after this party, I had a fight on my hands.

Fast forward a few years and a couple of Mild Ex'es, and a girl I was dating met Litmus Test for the first time. As before, things were fine during the actual event when they met. They exchanged pleasantries, and everyone seemed to be getting along well. A couple of days later, I once again had a big fight on my hands. Like I said, the details and the outcome aren't really the point (also, you should know by now that the point of my writing isn't to air dirty laundry). What is pertinent, though, is that some girl I was dating met Litmus Test, and then shortly thereafter, I had a fight on my hands.

I could understand this happening once, but twice? I'm thinking it's not exactly a coincidence. Also, Litmus Test has met exactly two women that I have been dating. She's batting 1.000 as of now. Now, to be fair to her, Litmus Test is innocent in all of this. But somehow, her mere presence is enough to trigger these events. Some people are considered good luck charms, some people act as muses for other people, and some people instigate fights. I just happen to be friends with the last one.

So, given all of this, you can see why my friend has earned the nickname. On the other hand, I've decided that if Litmus Test ever meets a girl that I'm dating and I don't end up in a big fight, I may have no choice but to marry that girl. I call her Litmus Test for a reason.

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