Out of Context

Remember how I sometimes end up in odd conversations? I've often wondered what would happen if someone only heard part of said conversations. I know that when I'm out in public, I sometimes overhear little snippets of conversations that make me chuckle. I know full well that these snippets are taken out of context, but that's what makes it even funnier. The whole thing is amusing to me.

Anyhow, I was thinking about it, and I've partaken in a good number of conversations that would lend themselves to this phenomenon. In the spirit of keeping things completely out of context, I won't explain what the conversations were about, nor why that particular comment was made. That'll be left up to your imagination, and I'm willing to bet money on the fact that doing it this way is going to result in more laughs on your end. Or, as all of my textbooks used to say, I've left that "as an exercise for the reader."

So, here are some context-less quotes taken directly from conversations in which I have partaken. If you manage to make it through all of them without at least a hint of a chuckle, let me know. I'd be legitimately curious about it. Either that, or I'd suspect that you and your imagination aren't very well acquainted. Regardless, without further ado:

• "You are the only person I know that gets dressed to go to bed"
• "Why do I have to be the Mild [Ex]?"
• "You have now challenged me to make you regret this"
• "You are fun-sized chipotle wasabi"
• "No way, I've got bigger guns"
• "I keep thinking, his mother must love him. What does she see that I don't?"
• "You look like you haven't gone shopping in ten years"

As you can probably guess, there are amusing stories attached to most, if not all, of those quotes. I won't necessarily tell all of them here, but it wouldn't be a surprise to see some of them pop up in blog posts. I'm telling you, this whole smart aleck thing has some real interesting perks associated with it.